Christina White

More Thoughts On NA Bevs…

So I was watching a movie last night and my spouse comes in and immediately begins looking for his beer (and when I say “beer” in the context of spouse or I drinking one, I of course mean “NA beer”) and he finally locates it then asks me if I want it and I’m like, yah, beer me! And he hands it to me and gets another one for himself (and that’s how he rolls, and this is why I keep him.)

ANYWAYYY, I open the suuuuper cold beer and take a few chugs and it probably took me about 30 minutes to finish it (which NEVER would have happened with a real beer) and I was thinking: this is how I would love be able to drink. As if actual wine or beer were NA and I would only drink them because they taste good or go nicely with my dinner. And I would only want one or at the most two because I really wouldn’t need any more than that to accomplish my goal of enjoying a delicious beverage.

Because who drinks like six Cokes in a row unless the Coke has rum in it, right?? You wouldn’t drink 6 or more of any NA beverage in a row because you’d be like HOLY FUCK, AM I SICK OF DRINKING THIS NOW. I’LL JUST STOP IT. AND I SURE HAVE TO PEE.

And then I could enjoy a variety of beverages because I’d be drinking them for sake of the drink and not the drunk.

What do you think….

Wouldn’t that be nice?????

Sure, and then the FUCKING UNICORNS WILL ARRIVE IN A CLOUD OF MAGIC SPARKLE DUST.

Because that shit is never going to happen. Hahahah! Not for me anyway. I guess that’s what it’s like to be a “normal drinker.” *sigh* Must be nice. Let’s have a quick pity party about it, shall we? Playing the world’s tiniest violin and all…

Okay, back to what you were doing. 😉

And also I wish all you folks a super happy new year and I hope the unicorn brings you much sparkle dust (of the NA variety, obviously.)

Posted in alcohol, sober, sobrietyTagged , , , , , 30 Comments

30 thoughts on “More Thoughts On NA Bevs…”

  1. I was at the grocery store with my youngest son (he’s four) and we walked down the beer aisle which also had things I needed. “No beer for you, right?” my son said, and I said, “No, none for me.”

    And then I looked for the NA section and found only two: Beck’s and O’Douls. “You know, there isn’t any alcohol in some beers like these,” I said. My son asked if I get buy it. I reached out and wrapped my fingers around a bottle of O’Douls…and then stopped.

    It was just too much like the real thing, and I had only touched it. Memories of drinking flashed through my mind, and time slowed down. I was really surprised; I can still my hand going out to touch the bottle, and I can still feel it..

    I don’t write this to make you or anyone feel bad about drinking NA beverages, and I’m not preaching to people and telling them what to do. I just wanted to share my experience. I wish I could indulge in a NA beer, and maybe one day I can…but based on yesterday’s experience, I’m not making it a goal.

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    1. Thanks for sharing that Robert. I totally understand that, which is why I avoided the NA wine for so long. But it sounds really triggery for you, so best to avoid. But no big deal, so many beverages to try in this world! Have a happy New Year, my friend!

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      2. I tried NA beer in my time of trying to do something about my drinking. For me it led inexorably back to the booze. So I drink coke, lemonade, apple juice, soda water – whatever but I stay clear of anything resembling an alcoholic drink. I know one friend who drinks it but it ain’t for me.

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    2. I was worried I would be like this. In the early early days I don’t think it would have helped me personally. I enjoyed my first NA beer so much I was worried if just drink them all the time. But after 1.5 I was done. Next day (Xmas) just had 3/4s of a bottle. But yeh I totally get where you are coming from.

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  2. Your spouse definitely sounds like a keeper!

    “…drinking them for the sake of the drink and not the drunk.” Exactly. That’s what I had pretty much lost when I decided to stop drinking. Rare were the times that it was just about the drink.

    Happy sparkly NA New Year!!!

    Wendy P

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    1. Oh, yah, he’s not going anywhere:) Very rare indeed. And now when I think about those *rare* moments I just think, “Oh well, fuck it, not happening, move on.” 🙂 Happy Sparkly Magic Unicorn-y New Year to you, Wendy!

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    1. Exactly!! I have 2 unfinished bottles from Saturday- the white I used to make fondue (it was wretched to drink) and the red that I marginally enjoyed. There was a time in my life when I had to throw out wine because I couldn’t finish the bottle but that ship has definitely sailed! Happy New Year to you, Snow Bunny!!

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  8. Well… I don’t even enjoy any other drinks but coffee, espresso and water. I don’t like sugary drinks or juices or anything that is not wine or tequila or coffee or water. I discovered this about myself during these holidays. If I am not drinking, I am quite happy with water. I am amazed. Oh… and I do consume a lot of water now. I am constantly peeing.

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    1. Wow, wine, tequila, or coffee, eh? Not much of a beverage repertoire. But water is really the best thing to drink. A lot of people can’t drink water (which blows my mind). I like water bubbly because I like the texture. Ditto on the peeing. HOwever, we’re doing a 15-day detox/cleanse right now and I think that’s adding to it.

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  10. Fabulous stuff, pink fluffy unicorns all the way …. I recently tryed and sort of enjoyed the AF beer but can’t face the wine yet as like Robert with the beer I find it too triggery. No holiday in the summer we were all peeing well to as we were drinking the fizzy water by the pint 🐟🐟🐟 . Moderation in reality is just a form of self torture.
    Happy New AF Year xxx

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  11. I love this. Pretty much exactly the same thoughts I was having the other night whilst having one. I do love that I have a couple in my fridge, in the same way I have a can of my fav soft drink. Which will just sit in there until I really want the taste – not the hit…

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  12. Hi Betty!
    I can only drink 1 NA beer too.
    I drink mostly water and coffee, and yes I pee a lot!
    But tonight hubs brought home the FRE NA wine for us to try.
    I told him you said it didn’t taste too bad.
    LOL
    I have a great hubs too.
    I have never had any problems with NA stuff triggering me.
    xo
    Wendy

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  13. Happy New Year filled with sparkly unicorns and fairy dust for you my friend! As for the NA stuff,I relied on it for my first months of sobriety, now I drink tea (yummy expensive loose tea), and very occasionally some fizzy N/A champagne – which I drink out of a champagne glass. And all the above makes me pee copiously. 🙂

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