Happy Sunday morning, sober citizens!
I haven’t posted in a while because I’m a lazy shit. I have been out and about on your blogs however, because it’s not like I can keep my virtual mouth shut for very long.
I finally finished the second bottle of fake wine (Fre) that I bought several weeks ago on whim because it just sounded good and it’s hard to find the merlot variety. Turns out, non-alcoholic wine DOES NOT GO BAD like actual wine, and I noticed no degradation in it’s sour grape juice taste. It’s actually not that bad..I mean, I DRANK IT, RIGHT? And it wasn’t because I wanted buzz so….
Last night we made pizzas in my nearly completed kitchen. I was OBSESSED with these fucking pizzas all day– they were going to happen. And they were fantastic. Holy shit. They were a thin crust variety, I polled several online recipes until I found one from a website that had a vaguely Italian name and contained the word “cucina” which instills a sense of authority where pizza making is concerned. Anyhoo it made two 12″ thin crusts which the spouse and I each crafted for ourselves using my amazing homemade pizza sauce (hope you’ll pardon the horn-tootlage here, I made it with my sauce I canned last fall, it was just REALLY GOOD). Combined with our new non-stick pizza pans (purchased at the premium grocery store price of $4.50 each) they were probably the best pizzas we’ve had for a long time.
So that was fun. Like really fun, and it was just me and the spouse. I read everyone’s blog (SO MANY AND YES I READ THEM ALL) and I can see that some of you are struggling with whether or not you will have/be fun after you’ve completely cut alcohol out of your life. I am here to tell you that you haven’t even imagined the vast variety of things that will bring you pleasure. But I’d like you to try it- imagining, that is. Because the amazing thing about sobriety -that is a little bit like magic- is that as soon as you think it you can do it.
WRAP YOUR MIND AROUND THAT FOR A MINUTE.
You conceive it, and then you go make it happen. Because you are no longer bound by the inaction forced on you by drinking: physical (drunk/hungover), mental (I don’t feel like it/can’t do it because *insert excuse*), financial (spending $400-$500/mo on booze/cigs/junk food), spiritual (I don’t deserve this).
When I discovered this it was absolutely life changing. I’d be thinking, I’d really like take a photography class…and then I realized, HEY! I CAN TOTALLY DO THAT IF I WANT TO. I can redecorate my spare room into my sewing room, I can buy paint and USE IT, I can install bookcases, ride my bike, cook pizza, study for certifications, etc. And enjoy doing it AT THE SAME TIME. Whoa.
Now I am not saying that we will suddenly be endowed with insane amounts of energy (hence my status as a lazy shit), or that we will, say, start getting up early on weekends or that we won’t come home after work and eat quesadillas in our bedrooms while watching HGTV (those are just generic examples, not what I do or anything, ahem..)
But for example:
One of things I did recently as a direct result of my (our, actually- mine and my husband’s) sobriety is visiting a financial adviser about retirement. That is a scary thing that I was not ever going to think about when I was drinking. If you haven’t done this already, I will tell you it is EYE-OPENING and SHOCKING when the adviser spins the computer monitor around to show you nifty graph featuring the GIANT RED MOUNTAIN of unfunded retirement, ei: where you run out of money when you’re 70. Yeeeeee. Since I plan on making it to approximately 105, this is an issue.
I did not want to deal with this before. I was declining this particular item on the MENU OF LIFE- ummm, no thank you! No responsibility for me today, I couldn’t eat another bite- CHECK!!! Because this information requires two things I was completely incapable of while drinking: action and change.Neither of those things were going to happen before I chose sobriety. They COULD NOT HAVE. Picture yourself DRUNKENLY INNOVATING.
How did that go??
But I’m ready for both of those things now. BRING THAT SHIT ON. You know, but gently. But bring it. Honestly, the money we are not spending on drinking/smoking will almost cover the cost of funding an IRA. And it’s okay!! We’re capable of managing this shit. We had a long discussion about whether or not to renew the Costco membership (you know, Costco, where a bag of cat food turns inexplicably into a new gas grill, a set of matching garden hoses, a gazebo and somehow a duck blind…and we don’t HUNT…????)
I know, I know…I was talking about *fun* and planning for retirement isn’t exactly a BARREL OF MONKEYS (which probably also isn’t fun, vis-à-vis monkey poop, etc) but hopefully you’ll catch my drift, Man.
You will have/be fun. Unless you’re just a total drag. Hahahah! But barring that, the fun train is leaving the station (or pulling in to the station, or whatever metaphor ACTUALLY ILLUSTRATES MY POINT.)
So I have one day of my weekend left, and I’ll be spending it painting my sewing room with what is (hopefully) the perfect shade of aqua (but may actually turn out to be horrifying powder blue). If you are interested in the results, I’ll be posting on Hammer Down.
Hope you all find some good times this week:)