Buying, Selling, Eating and of Course..the Beach

Hello Sober Blog Citizens!!

It is I. I have completed three months of real estate transaction torture and an ass-busting work schedule *whine, pule, cry* .

It’s been a while, so I think I’ll just launch into a Quarterly Sober Wrap Up aaaaaand HEREWEGO:


Work has been demanding and annoying. We are in a transition of communication technologies (it’s just so fucking boring I’m not going to try to explain) but the transition is extremely detailed and time consuming. The days are long. I’m on my feet all day. If I wasn’t a well-paid gum’t employee YOU MIGHT ACTUALLY FEEL SORRY FOR ME. Feel free to play your tiny violin with much fervor.


We were finally able to sell my home of nearly 20 years. I lived in it for 12 of those years, then it was a rental, this year it has found new people to love it. *SPOILER ALERT: MORE WHINING* We spent the better part of a year working on that fucker. Cleaning, patching, repairing, painting OMG THE ENDLESS PAINTING. Plumbing, HVAC, yard cleanup. At one point I just wanted to start writing to checks TO THE HOUSE. But after 60+ days of inspections, paperwork and the World’s Lengthiest Appraisal, the keys were handed off (all 12 of them…the previous renters handed me a baggy of key copies when they moved out..?? WTF….)


So after multiple visits to the Oregon Coast we finally decided that we needed a beach house. We just started barely looking at budget beach homes in a very competitive market in August with our Type-A agent JoAnn, when several opportunities presented themselves (or rather JoAnn EXPOSED THEM. She’s a real estate MACHINE. Feel free to ask me for her card). One of the homes we had coveted had sold rather quickly just was we started seriously looking. However, it was rumored to have an impending sale-fail (JoAnn has SOURCES that I shall never reveal) and so we made an offer on it before we ever entered the home. Folly??…or genius….??? YOU be the judge. Actually YOU’RE WRONG: the house is awesome. It’s a little bigger than a cabin, no ocean view but you can hear the surf.

It needs…a little help. Not much, we just have to remove the entire laundry room floor and replace it, and wreck out all the cabinets and possibly install a half bath. BUT NOTHING BIG.


Back in the summer we began our Arnold Schwarzenegger-inspired weight lifting program. Our original goal was a gym workout 6 days a week. That happened ONE TIME. Now our goal is 4 days a week and sometimes, our goal is ANY DAYS A WEEK. However, it’s a helluva workout. Even when we feel like weak whiny baaaabies (please say that to yourself in a Arnold-ian accent, it’s much funnier) we still bust out 12 sets. On days when we feel POSITIVELY OLYMPIC we do about 24-30 sets. We bench press. We dead lift. We lunge. I haven’t transcended to the next size down yet but I did manage to lose all of the Halloween candy-fat.

So as I prepare to head into another sober holiday season, I am attempting to remain vigilant lest I recreate the Continual Mouth Stuffing Fest of last winter. You know how it goes, starting now until the new year we will all be faced with one endless Sugar’N’Lard Buffet after another.

I say, if you need to eat to keep off the sauce, then eat. Fuck it. Losing weight is waaaaay easier than trying to quit drinking again. For me, when it comes to Sugar’N’Lard products, there’s a little bit of the attitude that got me in trouble with drinking: I’m an adult, I can eat it if I want to. So I’m being mindful of that little stupid-ass voice, and you all may want to do the same. Having said that, however, IF you have a monumental choice between a donut and a mimosa, you know what to do.

View from beach house living room..




27 thoughts on “Buying, Selling, Eating and of Course..the Beach

  1. Glad to hear from you.
    Your life sounds exciting (that’s code for overwhelming….I don’t think I could cope)! Lol
    Actually, you encourage me to not be a whimp. I am definitely In A complacent rut. I have actually resigned from a big commitment, so I have less going on. Is that self care or hibernating? I’m not sure…

    I love your view. That is worth it. Nice choice.


    Liked by 2 people

  2. Wow – that view is everything I imagine the Oregon coastal area to be – those trees are fabulous. Sounds like you’ve had a hell of a few months – imagine doing all that shizzle with a hangover?
    Now bloody well relax – and if you’re doing those Arnie workouts, plus a calorie deficit from not drinking, then this surely equals a bit of lard/stodge/PB chocolate in your life. Red xx

    Liked by 1 person

    1. I seriously doubt I would have been doing any of that shit with a hangover. Also, I wish everyone would STOP TELLING ME TO RELAX. Hahaha! It’s kind of like telling me to calm down when I have road rage. I DO NOT ACCEPT IT. Hahaha! My goal with the workouts is to be able to eat anything I want, provided it doesn’t make me bloat, burp or have heartburn. So almost nothing, actually.
      Was it you wanted to retire on the Oregon Coast? We are actually thinking of retiring at this house.

      Liked by 1 person

      1. Haha – yeah, the telling you to relax is like telling the tide not to come in I’m guessing! I’m much the same, if I ever have a rare day off I my idea of relaxing is usually an entire spring clean of the house, or “let’s sort out 40 years of accumulated crap out of the loft!!”. I’m thinking this might partly be why I used booze to switch off!
        Yes, I’ve never been to Oregon but fell in love with the look of it at an early age after discovering where the coastline in The Goonies was. And from everything I read, Portland sounds pretty cool. And by the time I retire, hopefully a certain recently elected “person” will be a distant memory..
        Please keep blogging if you have time, your posts always give me a lift, and never fail to crack me up 🙂 Red xx

        Liked by 1 person

      2. I have no moderation for relaxing– it’s either FULL TILT ON THE COUCH ALL DAY or I’m go-go-go. Must work on that.
        I think if not for the Goonies no would know we even have a coast. But yes, it all looks like that!


  3. Wow a lot has been going on. Your view looks lovely. Good advice about eating. I don’t eat the massive chocolate bar because I fear I may drink. I used to, but thats passed now. I do it because i can, habit or because I deserve it 😮 (warning bells). Can you eat alcoholically? Sometimes I think I do. Time to rein it in a bit and be more mindful before the festive season kicks off x

    Liked by 2 people

    1. I absolutely believe we can eat alcoholically. Being mindful is very effective- it’s so easy to mindlessly grab a handful every time you pass a candy dish. But you don’t even remember cramming it in your face!! So I stop myself and keep walking. Sometimes. Not always. hahahha!

      Liked by 1 person

  4. Oh, I love your beach house!!
    I am finding I am happier being a little more busy than not.
    When I am not busy, I tend to binge watch TV, and just sit too much.
    I love lifting weights, and although I am just doing yoga and walking, I would love to get back to some weights again!

    Liked by 1 person

  5. Just found the blog ad Loving it! That view is amazing…. enough to want to wake up and enjoy the sunrise with. Im in early days, so I am allowing myself to eat “alcoholically”, but thank you for pointing out that that i a thing!

    Liked by 1 person

  6. I adore your writing! I will go out and buy a tiny violin forthwith! You are inspriring me to start working out again, I remember how good it feels and it also helps to keep you away from booze in the early days.

    I have been know to eat “alcoholically” from time to time too, so maybe the working out will help with that 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

      1. Life sucks right now…but next week…as always….this week will become the past. Sooo ready to get past this work crap and move forward. My realtor emailed that my house listing expires. What does that mean? Do I have to pay them more money in the long run?

        Liked by 1 person

  7. Speaking from my sick bed (shameless prompt for everyone who bought tiny violins to play them for me) I am overwhelmed at what you do. There are Type A’s all go, go, go and then there is everything in between and then me Type Z, barely gets going ha ha. Yay for you on all of the above.
    Eating alcoholically is definitely a thing!

    Liked by 1 person

  8. I actually had to google puling. Now I’m going to use it as much as possible until it sticks in my swampy brain.
    Kudos on the beach house! That is the real estate coup of a lifetime. It’s going to be so much fun to work on it, and it already has a beautiful view. I love seeing a work in progress home renovation. Maybe you could film the whole thing, with entertaining banter and a few shocking scenes, for us viewers. You could be a reality TV star!
    You have given me the real estate bug and so are responsible for the results. I’m going to start trolling for real estate sites tomorrow. Maybe a mountain fixer upper? My husband is not much of carpenter, however. I can just hear him puling about being snatched away from golf to work on the cabin. (Is that correct usage?)
    So great and entertaining to hear from you, as always.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Haha!! Let us all pule!! Funny you should mention that, my husband insists we need our own HGTV show where we do VERY CASUAL diy. The show would consist of us moving heavy objects and screaming at each other for 10 minutes then high-fiving when it’s over. Then you’d see me tooling on something for an hour while he shops for tires on Craigslist. ABSOLUTELY RIVETING. yes! Mountain cabin, you need one!!


Talk To Me!

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s