OOH- WAH-AH-AH-AH!! (that’s for Anne, she knows what it means).
So I’m sick. Pretty big news around here as I am but rarely taken by malady (in Victorian-ese, if you please). Sometimes, one is infected at a “good time”, say in the middle of the winter when it’s preferable not to leave the house. But no, I had to get myself a FSC (fucking summer cold). The worst time to get a cold (FSC or other) is right before you have an event or a trip planned which is OF COURSE what happened to me.
It started 2 weeks ago on Thursday night, as I was awaiting the arrival of my two friends for our Sober Lady Beach Weekend. By Friday morning, driving out to the coast, I knew I that a virus was knocking at my metaphorical door: sore throat, headache, etc. I began with a MASSIVE overdose of vitamin C, followed by Emergen-C, echinacea, and a desperate swabbing of Zicam in my snout. I kept this routine up for the entire weekend, and managed to mostly feel okay, but by Monday airport drop off I knew I had lost the battle and was going doooowwwwn. And down I stayed. FOR A YEAR. Actually 3 days, but it felt like longer.
Now, a week and a half later I finally feel somewhat normal. You know what bothered me most while I was incapacitated? My filthy bathroom. OMG, it’s gross. One of my friends had to use it while staying at my house and I was like “KEEP YOUR EYES CLOSED THE WHOLE TIME”. I kept thinking, I have to go clean this shit IMMEDIATELY or I’ll probably die. Then I crawled back to my bed and continued watching reality TV and Star Trek Voyager.
Now that I feel better, I find I don’t give too much of a shit. I mean, I did finally vacuum the floor and wipe the counters and sinks, but the scouring I was planning on my death bed (yes, I was near death! shut up!) seems to have lessened in importance. So I began to question the urgency I had placed on the thing over which I had absolutely no control.
And isn’t that what we do, hyper-focus on the things in which we have no say over the outcome? I mean, if you can fix it, you would. You would just do it, you’d grab the stick vac and clean the floor. So why do we spin out on the situations that we CAN’T DO SHIT ABOUT?? Including but not limited to:
- What other people think about us
- Whether or not people in or lives drink or don’t
- Other people’s relationships
- Family dynamics
- Most of what happens at our jobs
- Pretty much ANYONE ELSE’S BEHAVIOR
And, yes, I understand that most people’s lives would be GREATLY ENRICHED if they just let us run them EFFICIENTLY. I know this deep in my control-freak heart. But alas, it is not to be. We have to take our hands off. We have to restrain ourselves from our inherent bossiness, even to the point of eye-twitch.
So there are a few nubbins on which to chew thoughtfully.
In other news, we got some rain. I know: BFD, Oregonian! The west coast has had a crazy 105F (40C+) heatwave. Add in smoke from a Canadian wildfire (don’t worry, a Canadian representative has already apologized) and mix that all into a tasty stew of swampy heat and air pollution. So it’s raining and it’s about 63F (17C) and it’s niiiiiice. Because what would you think of me if I didn’t bitch about the weather?? Which, interestingly enough, I ALSO CANNOT CONTROL.